i seriously don't know what i'm doing anymore. everything seems so useless i'd probably be doing nothing if i wouldn't get in trouble for it, i don't get the point of much i don't get school, jobs, work, it all seems like just some made up bullshit to make rich people feel in control. and they are in control. they control all of us, they dictate what we're gonna do, they could kill us all if they wanted, but why would they do that? why not have some "fun" first. i wish i could just sit around all day listening to music, and only talk to people for a few hours, and only specific people. but then again im really lonley, i don't even get why like i have friends but idk i just feel alone. maybe im just stupid? idk

it feels like im wasting my time by doing anything, i just want to have fun, but even when i try i can't, like i can but it just goes away and i feel empty. i always feel empty.